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A key member of our leadership team often reminds me that there are some lessons that cannot be taught. They must be caught. While attending in-person classes, online seminars, reading books and listening to podcasts are all effective methods of absorbing truth and producing behavioral change, nothing is more potent that being in an environment where you have direct exposure to a person or an institution that embodies the values to which you aspire.

I was reminded of this axiom earlier this summer. We finally convinced my mother to venture outside. For the past two years, she was extremely reluctant to do so. Every time I broached the idea, she would say “JoJo, (that’s my childhood name. And don’t ask—I don’t where it came from or how it started. Although my eight grade English Teacher did suggest that I was given that name because things had to be said twice for me to listen, LOL) you know I’m high risk.” At 81, she wasn’t playing any games with COVID19. But she had been in the house, alone, for far too long, so my brothers and I concocted a scheme to force her hand. We decided to have a birthday party featuring her six grandchildren cooking her a homemade meal. Well, that did it. When she finally got out of the house, we took her everywhere: the movies, the mall, her favorite restaurants, even the beach!

What is fascinating about traveling with my mother is that she does not open doors. If she rides in a car (front seat or back), she will wait until someone comes to wherever she is to come open her door. If she walks up to a mall or restaurant entrance, she will patiently wait until someone opens the door. Now, I have never heard her announce a policy to that effect. But I suppose that after being married to my gentlemen of a father for 55 years, she has always operated from the assumption that doors would be opened for her. Being with her reminded me of how powerful that expectation is. She never said anything to anybody. But whenever we got anywhere near a door, she just waited. And eventually, someone would come open the door.

Believers should operate with the same level of expectation that my mother does. Far too many of us are anxious, nervous and afraid. We rush through life concerned that we have to make something happen. However, we must begin operating from the assumption that doors are going to be opened for us. The Bible shares a powerful promise in Revelations 3:8:

….behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it.

This promise was made by the resurrected Christ to a group of believers who were a part of small, struggling church. It was given to provide them with the assurance that in spite of their difficulties, God was still moving on their behalf. Doors in the New Testament are typically used as metaphors for opportunity—so the meaning of this promise is profoundly reassuring. God has created some opportunities for us—and no one can stop them! This means you must start acting like my mother—start operating from the assumption that a door is going to be opened.

I have learned that there are actually 3 types of doors:

1. The Doors You Open. There are some opportunities that we create for ourselves. Although the idea of a self-made person is a myth, there is some validity to the idea that alot of what happens in our lives is because we made it happen. The only problem with the doors that you open is that you have to keep them open. There is a limit to individual effort and energy.

2. The Doors That Others Open. There are some opportunities that others create for us. All of us are standing on somebody’s shoulders. Whether it was a parent, a relative, a teacher, a coach or a co-worker—all of us have had someone in our lives who planted a seed, recommended a book, made an introduction, or gave us a loan that helped us to get to the next level. The only problem with the doors that other people open is that the people who opened them rarely let you forget that they are the ones who opened the door. As a result, they feel responsible for your success and behave as if you owe them praise or pay—or both.

3. The Doors That God Open. This is the best kind of opportunity. I know this may be hard for some of you to believe, but let the promise sink deeply into your heart. God has created some opportunities just for you. They will come from people you least expect, at times you least expect, and will solve some pressing need. And they will cost you nothing—but some faith.

My mother has taught me much more than I have ever learned from any of the schools that I have attended. But what I caught from her this summer was the best lesson ever.