Many of us spend a considerable, and perhaps justifiable amount of time complaining that we don’t have any or enough help. You’ll get no argument from me there. Help is hard to find. And good help is even harder to find. But instead of carping, let’s employ the counsel of a previous blog, and look at this predicament from the reverse lens. Here’s this week’s question:

When is the last time you helped somebody…who wasn’t a relative?

(Is that the chirping of crickets I hear ? LOL)

In this case, most of us are probably guilty of what we are complaining about. Far too many of us would probably have difficulty recalling more than a handful of episodes over the past few years in which we engaged in a selfless, sacrificial act of service towards someone in whom they did not have a romantic interest or share a family relation. Tis a pity. But tis true.

Christians are called to a higher standard. In 1 John 3:16, the scripture says “by this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.” Jesus is our pattern, precept and example. We should endeavor to live and love as he did. And since he laid down his life for us, we ought to be willing to laid down our lives for others.

While issuing greetings to a man named Aquila and his wife In Romans 16:3-4, Paul deploys a striking metaphor to describe their impact on his life. He informs his audience that Priscilla and Aquila have "laid down their necks” for his sake. The metaphor is striking because of the significance of the neck in human anatomy. According to one source,

The neck refers to the collection of structures that connect the head to the torso. It is a complex structure of many bones, muscles, nerves, blood vessels, lymphatics, and other connective tissues. The cervical spine is the bony part of the neck. Its primary function is to support the skull while still allowing for movement. It is the most flexible part of the spine. This flexibility allows for large movements to scan our surroundings. Most sensory inputs occur at the head; thus, proper neck movement is vital to survival.

The neck also acts as a conduit for the brain to communicate with the rest of the body. Motor and sensory information and nutrients from the body to the head and vice versa must all pass through the neck. The neck is also subject to stress and susceptible to injuries. Given its importance, injuries can sometimes have significant consequences for our functionalities and are even fatal.

Would you rather break your arm? Your leg? Or your neck? Well, none of the above. LOL. But if I had my druthers, the last option seems significantly less painful than the first two. The thought of breaking my neck sends shivers down my spine. I often joke that many married Christian women bristle at the notion that the man is tasked with being the “head of the house.” But as I must frequently remind them, the neck turns the head. And the right woman can turn a man around! (Bonus track)

According to Acts 18:1-3, Paul met this couple when he founded the church in Corinth, and that they lived together because they shared a common profession as tentmakers. But clearly what started as a common interest in making tents grew into a common interest in making disciples, and they became the best and the closest of friends. Their love, commitment and care for each other grew to such an extent that Aquila and Priscilla exposed themselves to danger to save Paul's life and to further the Kingdom.

Paul sends greetings to or refers to more than 100 individuals by name in the 13 letters that he wrote in the New Testament. But of all those names, only Aquila and Priscilla distinguished themselves by an act of sacrifice so impactful that Paul compared it to sticking out one’s neck. We don't know what they did or when they did it, but at some point during their relationship, they made a decision or took an action that so impacted Paul that he was compelled to acknowledge it, and could only describe it as them “risking their necks.” The tension between self-love and self-transcendence is one that we will always face. However, a commitment to Christian living requires that we sacrifice our comfort and convenience, transcend our preoccupation with self, and stick our neck out for something or somebody!

Everyone is always sticking out their hands. Even more stick out their tongues. However, not too many people stick out their necks. And this may be one reason why so many of us are unhappy, unmotivated, and unfulfilled. I’ve been reading a book this week by Sebastian Junger called Tribe. In the introduction, he makes a startling statement, and then raises an even more startling question. He says “Humans don’t mind hardship, In fact, they thrive on it; what they mind is not feeling necessary.” Then he asks: “How do you become an adult in a world that does not ask for sacrifice?”

Perhaps we are unhappy, unmotivated and unfulfilled because we feel unnecessary. George Bernard Shaw rightly said that the greatest joy in life is to be used for a “mighty purpose.” Perhaps we are unhappy, unmotivated and unfulfilled because this world only asks us to consume. Waiting in line for the latest iteration of the IPhone is not a sacrifice.

Stop sticking your hand out.

Stop sticking your tongue out.

Start sticking your neck out!