Holding Back Will Hold You Back

As many of you know, I served as Chaplain of the Los Angeles Clippers for almost a decade. That experience easily ranks as one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. It was rewarding because it provided me with an opportunity to offer spiritual guidance to world class athletes. It was also rewarding because as a former high school benchwarmer, retired pick-up player and lover of a great game, it provided me with the opportunity to watch several great games between great teams for free, with pretty great seats too boot! And it was finally rewarding because as a student of personal and organizational success, it provided me with the opportunity to observe the habits, protocols and systems of world-class athletes and organizations at close range.

One of the highlights of that experience was meeting Kobe Bryant. Well, technically, I didn’t “meet” him. “Encountered” him is probably a more accurate description. Our encounter occurred one season right before the playoffs were scheduled to begin. I saw him leaning up against the wall near the locker room, so I went and stood beside him. We exchanged head nods and a mutual “what-up man.” I was just about to give him a fist-bump and introduce myself when a reporter eased a microphone toward his mouth and asked him if he was excited about the playoffs. Crisply, sharply, and tartly he said “not really.” Then, with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders, he added “it’s just another game” and then disappeared into the locker room.

That reply helped me understand what made Kobe so great. From his perspective, every game was the same. No matter when he played, where he played, or who he played, he approached every game with the same level of intensity, discipline, preparation and dedication. Every time Kobe stepped onto the court, he was going to give you all that he had. He never held anything back.

If more of us lived our lives the way that Kobe played basketball, we would have far more happiness and far less regret. But for many perfectly understandable, perfectly rational reasons, we have a tendency to hold back.

We hold back from pursuing our dreams.

We hod back from expressing our emotions

We hold back from sharing our ideas.

We hold back from investing in people.

We hold back from getting involved in causes that can advance the agenda of righteousness.

But holding back only holds you back.

In Matthew 10:39, Jesus said “If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself!” (MSG)

Consider these words from Theodore Roosevelt:

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

True success comes from spending yourself—from being in the arena. Far too many of us are sitting on the sidelines of life, holding back, waiting for permission to

Wear the outfit.

Send the card.

Go on the trip.

Start the business.

Make the call.

But the more we hold back, the further we fall back.

Near the end of his life, Paul went to visit a church that he had started and reminded them of the legacy that he was leaving. The sacred historian informs us that

From Miletus he sent to Ephesus and called for the elders of the church. And when they had come to him, he said to them: “You know, from the first day that I came to Asia, in what manner I always lived among you, serving the Lord with all humility, with many tears and trials which happened to me by the plotting of the Jews; how I kept back nothing that was helpful, but proclaimed it to you, and taught you publicly and from house to house, testifying to Jews, and also to Greeks, repentance toward God and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ. Acts 20:18-20

To hold back nothing—to leave all that you can, and the best that you can, with as many as many people as you can—what a legacy worth imitating!

May that legacy be yours.

Only dogs belong on leashes.