Putting MakeUp On A Pig

It’s hard not to like Charles Barkley. These days, most know him as one of the most colorful commentators on television, one of the anchors of the Emmy award-winning show Inside The NBA, which airs before and after professional basketball games on the Turner Broadcasting Network. But prior to his stint as a media personality, Barkley was a 11-time All Star and one-time MVP who played for three teams over 16 seasons in the National Basketball Association. During his professional basketball career, Barkley was known for his ferocious style of play, which earned him the moniker “the round mound of rebound.” It was hard not to like Barkley during his playing days, and it is even harder to not to like him now.

He is one of the few athletes who has fared better after his career on the court than he did while on it. Although he never won a championship, he has elevated his post-game play to an extraordinary level. Over the past several years, he has contributed millions of dollars to historically Black colleges and Universities, including Morehouse College (my alma mater), Clark-Atlanta University, and Miles College, He has contributed even more to Auburn University, his alma mater. And just last year, he gave $1 million to St. Mary’s Academy in New Orleans, after two students there solved a mathematical problem that had vexed mathematicians for centuries.

It’s hard not to like Charles Barkley. But what I like about him most is his often brutal and hilarious commentary. He has an ample supply of common sense, and has a tendency of saying what everyone is already thinking but may lack the courage, confidence, or charisma to express.

His unique insight was recently on unparalled display while analyzing a game which the Los Angeles Fakers (ahem, excuse me—the Lakers) lost again. He challenged the optimism of current coach JJ Reddick, and went on to explain how the Lakers have fired the last two coaches even though they both did as good as job as is possible with the current roster. Then he put the hay down where everyone could get it. Barkley said “The Lakers stink. He (Reddick) came in there thinking, ‘I can make this thing work…Put some makeup on that pig. … The Lakers stink, man. C’mon, man.”

When I heard Barkley’s comments, I laughed so hard that my stomach hurt. The truth is that Lakers do stink. The truth is that they have stunk for a long time. And the truth is that until they make some much needed upgrades to their roster, they are going to continue to stink. Barkley said what everyone already knows but is afraid to admit, especially in our fair city.

That expression that Barkley used—“putting makeup on a pig”— is something I’ve heard my parents and grandparents say all of my life. Essentially, it means trying to dress up an ugly situation, to make something look better than it is or can ever be. It’s much different from trying to make the best of a bad situation. Putting makeup on a pig is fundamentally dishonest, because it fails to embrace reality. It is a denial of the stubborn facts of a situation, and an effort to displace or distort or even destroy the truth. Unfortunately, putting makeup on a pig is not a new phenomenon. It is an ancient practice with deep roots in the subsoil of the human soul.

One of the best biblical examples of this custom was exemplified by Jezebel, who was one of the ugliest characters in scripture. When I refer to Jezebel as one of the ugliest characters in scripture, I am not referring to her physical appearance. Instead, I am referring to her moral character. The old folks used to say that “ugly is as ugly does,” and Jezebel did plenty of ugly. She was an unbelieving, domineering wife, who used her power and position to oppress the weak. After growing tired of her malicious murderous reign, God commanded a man named Jehu to go and eliminate her. When Jezebel heard that Jehu was coming, 1 Kings 9:30-35 informs us that

When Jezebel heard about it, she put on eye makeup, arranged her hair and looked out of a window. As Jehu entered the gate, she asked, “Have you come in peace, you Zimri, you murderer of your master?” He looked up at the window and called out, “Who is on my side? Who?” Two or three eunuchs looked down at him. “Throw her down!” Jehu said. So they threw her down, and some of her blood spattered the wall and the horses as they trampled her underfoot. Jehu went in and ate and drank. “Take care of that cursed woman,” he said, “and bury her, for she was a king’s daughter.” But when they went out to bury her, they found nothing except her skull, her feet and her hands.

Instead of acknowledging her wickedness, Jezebel put on makeup.

Instead of repenting from her sins, Jezebel put on makeup.

Instead of begging for mercy from Jehovah, Jezebel put on makeup.

Instead of seeking salvation, she settled for seduction

Jezebel was an ugly woman who lived an ugly life and died an ugly death, and no amount of makeup could save her. No amount of makeup can make up for poor character. They threw Jezebel out the window and couldn’t find enough of her to assure a proper burial.

Here’s today’s question: what unpleasant, unproductive or unattractive areas of your life are you trying to paint over?

As we head into another year, let’s stop trying to make our pigs attractive. Whatever and wherever the ugliness is in our lives, let’s look at it deeply, label it correctly, and labor to kill it before it kills us.