The Blame Game
I once read in an old book that a famous preacher would begin each new year by reading one chapter per day in each of the four books in the Bible that describe beginnings: the book of Genesis (the beginning of the world). the book of Ezra (the beginning of the nation of Israel), the book of Matthew (the beginning of the gospel), and the book of Acts (the beginning of the church). I always thought that was a great idea, so I decided to add that practice to my morning ritual.
On January 3rd, I reread the story of Adam and Eve’s disobedience to God in the garden of Eden. God instructed them (well, specifically he instructed Adam—but let’s not explore the grave implications of that today) not to eat of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and Evil. The enemy (in the form of snake) convinces Eve that eating the said fruit from the said tree was harmless, beneficial, and that the command from God was motivated by divine jealously. Eve eats the fruit, shares it with her husband, and well, the rest is history.
What struck with particular force as I reread this passage was how quickly both Adam and Eve resorted to blame when confronted with the evidence of their disobedience, . Here are their responses:
The man replied, “It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it.”Then the Lord God asked the woman, “What have you done?” “The serpent deceived me,” she replied. “That’s why I ate it.” Genesis 3:12-13
So…Adam blamed God and Eve blamed the Devil. And this is 3 chapters in! Here’s the point: human beings have been playing the blame game for a loonooong time.
I’ve been thinking about the “blame game” alot lately because it seems that almost everyone is blaming COVID for just about everything.
Gained weight? COVID.
Bills late? COVID.
Marriage falling apart? COVID.
Depressed? COVID.
Late For The Appointment? COVID
Drinking more often? COVID
House a mess? COVID.
Yelled at the cashier? COVID.
COVID has become the default excuse for almost every conceivable personal and social fault. Now let’s be clear: this pandemic has wrought havoc on almost every conceivable aspect of our lives, and so much of our society is still reeling from its nefarious effects. COVID has caused several fundamental changes to how we live, how we work, and how we love. I do not anticipate life to return to anything remotely close to what our pre-pandemic lives were like. However, I am firmly convinced that crises do not only create problems. I think crises also reveal and accelerate problems that were already there.
Has COVID caused some problems? Absolutely
But it has not caused as many problems as we are giving it credit for. It has revealed some ugly truths and accelerated some inevitable changes that were already afoot. But instead of taking a hard long look at our lives, and a long hard look at our society, it is so much easier to lay all of our personal and societal ills at the feet of the pandemic.
Playing the blame game is an old as the Garden of Eden, and all of us have been contestants. If we haven’t blamed the pandemic, we have blamed something: our parents, our background, our disadvantages. I was a substitute teacher in the Boston Public Schools during my graduate school days, and I was talking with a group of six graders about how poorly they had scored on a test. When I asked one of the students why he got a 3 on the test (yes, a 3), his response was priceless. He said “racism.” Everyone bust out laughing (me included). But it blew my mind that at that age, these yoing men had already begun to adopt the strategy of absolving themselves of any responsibility for the outcomes in their lives.
This is not to deny that are forces beyond our control that impact our lives. But to be human (at its best) is to be responsible. And as Stephen Covey once said, being responsible means that we all are Response able. We are able to respond. No matter what external forces may constrain our choices, there is always a margin available to respond. We are not “playthings of circumstance.” And even when we cannot take action, we can choose to how to think and how to feel. Stop playing the blame game. You are response-able.
I am only one. But I am one.
I can’t do everything.
But I can do something.
And what I can do, I should so.
And what i should do, by the grace of God, I will do.